Thursday, September 26, 2002 Deep Shit So I've been thinking again (gasp!). Most of my latest contemplations have been on the matter of ranking the various components of my life based on importance. I've come to some startling conclusions, which do not particularly need to be elaborated upon. What is relevant is that I have discovered a 'diametric opposition' if you will. I derive a certain amount of enjoyment from having funds available awaiting expenditure at my discretion. However, I find my current means of obtaining said funds, ie, my 'job' to be particularly offensive to my sensibilities. I am completely convinced that my current occupation is simply unsuitable for a 'reasoned' person of my temperament. I am not completely sure if I am opposed to all forms of employment, or simply those in which I am trained. I'm tending to believe it is the latter. Hence the moral dilemma in which I find myself. I've been thinking a lot about my resignation letter. The thought of completing one makes me absolutely giddy. The weather is changing and the winds of change are blowing. I am now opening my eyes, ears, and mind; and I am patiently awaiting a sign that will point me in the right direction. That and I'm updating my monster resume for the second time in as many weeks. But no matter. My mood is not one of desperation or frantic need to escape. I am happily awaiting the next step and am ready to start practicing (at least some of) what I preach.
I have asked myself a question. And as far as shoveling horse shit for a living, I've determined that, while this would be far from ideal, I actually find it more appealing that shoveling bureaucratic shit. For one thing, horse shit is one of the least offensive of the major excrements (not to say it's inoffensive, but that is another matter). For another, if I were shoveling horse shit, it would be due to the fact that there was a legitimate need for this service and I would be compensated at a mutually agreed-upon rate by someone who is not being coerced in any way to part with their honestly earned funds. So it is very much a moral issue. This being said, I'm not quite ready to start zapping resumes to area stables. I am in a good position to take the time to find something better suited to me. I have no expectations of finding my true calling just yet, but I plan to make this step a step in the right direction. All I'm looking for is improvement. It is my wish that such improvement is not too much to ask.
Met-Rx Lite is sooooo rancid! There is just nothing good about it at all. My expectations about it being like Met-Rx but with fewer calories couldn't have been more wrong. This stuff can't be redeemed either. After tasting how repugnant it is, I thought I might be able to improve it by putting it through the blender with some tasty frozen raspberries. This was a cruel, cruel thing to do to the raspberries and I feel that much worse for doing it. It was also an exercise in futility, as it would take a lot more than raspberries to kill the taste of this vile concoction. 0 - Yeck!
8:57 AM
Tuesday, September 24, 2002 Clarity of Thought is a VERY Bad Thing
I've been able to think clearly today, which is a very bad thing (see title). The more I think about things, the more these thought-about things tend to bother me. If I remain blissfully ignorant and accepting of things, then everything seems fine and I'm basically happy. However, if I begin to analyze, as I often do, I'll find myself hating a great many aspects of my existence. It all comes down to the word "why." If you ask yourself WHY you like something, you'll often come to the conclusion that you were mistaken and that you don't really like it. I ask WHY far too often and try Bud Dry far too less. At times like this I almost wish I was a blithering idiot as opposed to the mere garden-variety, so that I might have a few moments of contentment. But alas.
Here Ends the Contemplative Segment
Nutrition Savings is now on the permanent irrevocable shit list. My long awaited (well over a week now) supplements did not arrive yesterday, and I'm almost 100% convinced that those bastards overcharged me for shipping. I had to resort to buying a 60 capsule bottle of Ripped Fuel at Target in order to sustain myself. In all my years of online supplement ordering, I've never had a bad experience, and most went beyond expectation, so I guess it is to be expected, c'est la vie and all that crap. But waxing philosophical about it or calculating the statistical probability isn't going to improve my muscle/fat ratio! Now is it?
10:31 AM
